Snow, snow, so much snow.
The most in the state, to be exact. I’m not sure how that happened. We were right on the edge of predictions of “a lot” and “not a lot” of snow, and we ended up with 5” more than the upper limit of predictions. Towns next to us got half as much as we did. Apparently we live in a snow pocket. A wonderful place to be when you have a broken snow blower, and a driveway that a plow truck can’t clear.
I think we surprised a few people with our decision to have more than two kids (although I think those who know us the best saw it coming), because I’m definitely realizing that most people expect you to stop at one or two. Two is normal, one is understood, but and more than that and you start getting questions and looks.
This year has really been an experiment in the minimal amount of brain power required to still function as an adult. Something about this pandemic and repetitive home monotony has turned my brain to mush. Add in all the insane things happening in the world, and my brain just wants to shut down, instead of think of the consequences of an attempted coup.
So of course it’s super fun to add in pregnancy brain, plus nausea medication that includes a time released sleeping pill that keeps me in a never ending fog.
This past year, as awful as it’s been at times, has also taught me a lot. About what’s important, what makes me happy, and what I think is really important in life. I’ve also realized I no longer have the energy to waste on things like keeping secrets. And so, one of the bigger secrets I’ve had to keep in my adult life, I have no interest in keeping again.
I’m pregnant!
Oh hey, a lot’s happened this week. Let me try and catch you up.
You may remember we had a pregnant cat. A pregnant cat who was overdue, according to my calculations. It was getting to the point that it was almost comical. I was posting daily updates to let everyone know she was still pregnant, because I would get so many messages every morning asking. At work, too. I have a co-worker who got some chickens at the beginning of quarantine as her project, but they hadn’t laid any eggs yet. So every time we’d have a team meeting, our boss would ask: “Are there any kittens? Are there any eggs?” Always no.
Right before G was born, I looked at the nurse and said, “Remember, I’m a bleeder!” I was laughing, but we’d talked about it seriously before, and she started getting the necessary medicine ready, but I bled faster. Just like last time, the moment I delivered, I started to hemorrhage. One bad thing about being more alert than last time, is that I was also much more aware of how much I was bleeding and how concerned everyone was. Even with all the medication they gave me, it still took a while to get everything under control, and I ended up losing about twice as much blood as a C section, double what I lost when I delivered E.
After I got my first dose of medicine, Tom and I settled in to wait. We ordered dinner, and watched Game night and Jumanji in our room. Around 4:30 I mentioned to Tom that my head was a little itchy, and that was weird. A little while later, it was REALLY itchy and I couldn’t stop itching. I must have been freaking him out a bit, because he said he was going to go find our nurse. By the time they returned, not only was I going crazy with an itchy scalp, but my hands had turned bright red and my palms were also super itchy.
Knowing that I was already allergic to one type of antibiotic, the nurse got worried and immediately stopped the vancomycin and called the doctor. Within a few minutes, my itchiness had gone away, and my hands were no longer red. After some brainstorming between the doctor and pharmacist, it was decided that I was having a transfusion reaction, and not a reaction to the actual antibiotic. Because my itching stopped so quickly, and the antibiotic was still in my system, it was decided I could safely finish my dose, just at a slower pace. Luckily after the dose was slowed, no more itching! And in better news, as long as I delivered by 5am the next morning, I wouldn’t need another dose of antibiotics.
I’m having a hard time putting into words G’s birth story, partly because I’m still not sure how I feel about it. It seems like it went by almost too quickly? Is that possible in labor? After 9 months of building up to it, it was over so fast, and looking back, I feel like I could have done it so much better! It’s almost like I want a second chance to see if I could have… I’m not even sure. Enjoyed it more? Savored each contraction? It’s really an odd feeling.
It’s been interesting putting this room together. It almost didn’t happen, and then it did, but while we were working on it, we were constantly thinking ahead. Because we know at some point “soon” it won’t be a second nursery, but will be E’s big kid room.
The eventual plan, when E is ready to be out of a crib, will be for the new baby to move into E’s crib, and E to move into this room with a toddler bed. It sounds complicated, but trust me there’s logic there. So it’s interesting that as I’m putting it together, I’m thinking more about it as a toddler’s play room than a baby’s room. We already have a perfectly good baby room next door.
By now they’ve all been sent out, and if you’re on our list, you’ve probably received ours. (And if not, let me know!) Yes, they were early - although that’s not unusual for me. As with everything this year, though, it either needs to be early or not at all. Just be glad I waited until after Thanksgiving to mail them out, because trust me they were ready before that!
I’ve mentioned that I’m being monitored like crazy during this pregnancy. I’m really appreciative of it, and I love my medical team, so I’ve managed to not be too anxious or worried, which is great.
Baby has been doing wonderful, and lately I’ve been feeling pretty good too. I mean I’ve been super sick, but that has nothing to do with being pregnant. All my pregnancy symptoms have really mellowed lately, so I’ve officially reached the “forgetting I’m pregnant” stage again. It’s weird to be so pregnant and feel that way, but it happened last time at the end too. Something about the baby changing position or dropping I think.
Here’s my tip to other pregnant women: If there’s some idea you have floating in your mind, but you keep putting it off or saying no because logically you know it doesn’t make sense, just go ahead and do it NOW. Otherwise, you’re going to hit 38 weeks and decide that it needs to happen that minute, and all logic goes out the window.
Normally, I am queen of logic. It rules my life. I am fine with putting off projects or saying no to things, because I know the reasons why it wouldn’t be a good idea. And so this entire pregnancy I’ve been saying that no, the guest room can stay the way it is for now. No, we don’t need a second baby room right now. The baby wouldn’t be using it right away anyway - I mean E slept in the living room for the first few months of his life. This baby can sleep in our room if need be.
My mind is all over the place lately with lists of things to do, thoughts about the upcoming holiday and baby coming, things to do with E… I’m as frazzled as you’d think haha. So here is a random brain dump of what’s going on with us lately.
E had his 18 month check up the other day. Everything looked great, the doctor was super happy, and this little munchkin gained TWO inches in the past three months!! He gained a pound, which is right on track, but the doctor was super excited for his growth spurt! No wonder he can touch the ground on his little car now. I’ve updated this post with percentiles, etc.
I’m actually doing okay this week, physically at least. Mentally I’m all over the place. Both with worrying about E (even though I know he’s fine) and new baby (who’s going to be uber monitored so I also shouldn’t be worried), but I really feel like I could use a relaxing vacation or something right now (never going to happen).
Not that I haven’t been, but I’m not sure I’ve been brutally honest lately either.
This pregnancy is hard.
I wasn’t shy last time from letting people know that I didn’t enjoy being pregnant. And that’s still true. Sure there are some things that are fun (getting seats on the T!), but overall, it’s not the best experience for me.
I was hoping I’d have more time. After all, I’m only 7 months pregnant, and I was crossing my fingers I’d have at least another month. But apparently this is it. This is where I’ve run out of time, energy and motivation apparently.
There is still a lot to do. There’s a baby to prepare for, holidays are coming up and presents need to be wrapped, cards need to be sent, and then there’s the normal things, like remembering to do laundry (or more realistically, remembering to put it away after its been washed), and getting myself dressed and out the door every day.