Month Updates

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18 Months

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I can’t decide if the past 6 months have gone quickly or not. Sometimes it felt like a never ending slog that we were sleepwalking through, but on the other hand I swear we just celebrated F’s first birthday. Either way, we have an official 18 month old on our hands. And thanks to a sleep consultant, we are back on track with sleep and everyone is feeling more like themselves lately. F is back to sleeping and happily chatting in her crib, and it feels like at least one layer of stress has evaporated.

F remains the happiest Spearson, excited to be a part of things, and loves it when we go somewhere. She mostly gets mad when we try to remind her she’s a baby and can’t always do the same things that the older two can. Oh how quickly she’s going to demand equal treatment though. Already she fights back if someone tries to push her away.

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15 Months

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Hello toddler!

Although she doesn’t have many words, she’s soo close to talking non stop. Sometimes babble just pours out of her mouth like she has so much to say and she’s tripping on all the sounds. Other times you’ll say something and she’ll immediately repeat it exactly once. I’ve heard kitty, “right there” and “hi bus” this week alone, but it disappears as quickly as it comes.

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ONE YEAR

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Even though this is our third first birthday, it’s still just as much of an accomplishment each time. We did it. We survived the year! And I’m always just as shocked about how quickly it went by. How are you one already?

Your year feels split in half - the first half you were the easiest little squish baby who just came along wherever we went. The second half, aka the mobile half, is when things got a little crazy. You became strongly opinionated and LOUD. You aren’t talking but you still blow us lots of raspberries, give very wet kisses and screetch often. You’re constantly moving and climbing and exploring and trying hard to become a full on toddler. You love eating chicken nuggets and pasta and drinking from a sippy cup just like a big kid.

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Eleven Months

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Of course because I mentioned how much I loved your gummy smile last month, you immediately popped out two bottom teeth - officially becoming the youngest child in this family to get a tooth! Maybe that’s what was messing with your sleep last month? It’s definitely gotten better - you still hate being put to bed, but then you fall asleep quickly and are back to sleeping through the night.

This month you have definitely decided what you want, and anytime you don’t get it you start immediately crying, fold in half, and put your forehead on the ground until someone comes to comfort you. Specifically you want to be held, but doing something interesting, or you want to be down on the ground playing, but with me or Tom less than 3 inches away.

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Ten Months

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I’m not sure if it’s too much to say, but this might be your hardest month yet. You hit a sleep regression HARD, at the same time separation anxiety peaked. Suddenly you’re fighting sleep, you’re screaming, and one night you were up from 9pm until midnight. It wasn’t fun. We’ve mostly moved passed that, but you’re still not as “easy” as you were a month ago. You want to be walking, but you can’t yet. You want to explore but you also don’t want to be out of our arms. And you cry at daycare drop off now. So it’s been a rough month. We’ll get through it, of course.

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Nine Months

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Well after saying I wasn’t sure what makes you upset, this month definitely gave me a few examples. For whatever reason, your stranger danger seems to come and go. You’ve always loved daycare and never reacted poorly there, but suddenly you’ll burst into tears if a neighbor that you’ve known since you were born tries to hold you. While you often seem to be more like G in that you don’t want me to hug or cuddle you too much (you’ll go so far as to punch me in the throat to try to get out of a hug), you’ve also been a bit attached to me lately. You want me to sit approximately 2 inches from you on the ground next you to. Close enough that you can have a hand on me or crawl into my lap if needed, and if I try to leave the room or move away, you’ll start crying. That’s definitely new.

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Eight Months

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This might finally be the month that breaks me, because having three mobile children is definitely harder than two and a baby. I think we can finally say you’ve figured out this crawling thing, although not well enough for us to realize that when we put you somewhere, you’re not going to stay there. You’re moving just enough that we’re still surprised to find you in a new spot. You bounce and spin and take a break to sit and then get up and move another step or two, but you’re definitely moving, and obviously thrilled about it.

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Seven Months

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After a few boring months, this was a big one for you! Not only did you leave the house, you left the state and flew all the way to Florida! And then we discovered that you aren’t really used to being outside, and it’s a huge adjustment. We’ll just say it wasn’t your favorite, so after a trip to a playground, a hike to the river, and a farmer’s market all in the first two days, we mostly let you stay in the house after that.

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Six Months

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By some weird turn of the calendar, you don’t really get a half birthday this year. It’s better than being born on a leap day, sure, but it did give me a bit of pause when deciding when to celebrate. The answer of course was whenever we wanted to.

This was a big month for you - you started daycare! You were getting extremely bored at home every day, and seem to be doing well at school. Except for the first day when you came home so exhausted you could barely make a noise or keep your eyes open, you’ve adjusted great. You don’t cry at drop off, and they say you’re happy during the day. E occasionally peeks in the window at you and finds you napping in a crib. It’s both weird and fun to be driving home from pick up with three children in the car. Sure it takes us a while to get everyone strapped in, but you’re a pretty good sport. I don’t want to jinx us, but you may be my baby who has hated the car the least. Not enough to sleep in the car, but I’ll take neutrality.

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Five Months

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Well this month you have officially moved from a baby that is content to be along for the ride, to our ‘baby baby’ who wants to explore and do. No longer can we put you down on the floor with some toys and expect you to be content. You need to be entertained and experience and see new things. Which has been hard since we haven’t left the house this month. It makes me hopeful that your transition to daycare will be smooth, though. The other day E was explaining to you what daycare would be like. He was telling you what your room was going to look like, and made sure you knew that he’d be able to see you and check on you through the windows multiple times per day.

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Four Months

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More than once this month I’ve said that I think we’ve found our loudest child. You have found your voice and you love to sing and make everyone know that you have opinions. You are making sure that you will not be a forgotten third child. I’m not sure how you could be, you’re everyone’s favorite. Even the cats like to come check on you multiple times a day. Your siblings are still your favorite - after a particularly fussy day, the first time you seemed truly happy was at the end of the day when I set you up watching G.

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Three Months

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What a determined little baby you are. You’re not content with being a newborn anymore. You’re learning to roll and are working hard at sitting up too, when all we want is to enjoy you as a baby for as long as possible. You see your older siblings doing things, and you just want to be where they are. You love them so much, if you hear them you’ll crane your neck and move your body to try and see them. Of course they love you just as much, some nights you get a hug when Mama and Dad don’t.

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Two Months

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About halfway through the month, I looked at you and realized you were no longer a newborn. It was shocking and sad. I wasn’t sure how the change had happened so quickly, and was immediately mourning the fact that you’d left the sleepy and squishy phase. It is, of course, an accomplishment for you. You’re growing! You’re one step closer to showing us who you are as an independent person. And pretty quickly I learned to love this new phase too. You love eye contact, and when I coo at you, I can make you smile.

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One Month

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A whole month. A month of cuddles and smelling your head, and staring into your eyes. It’s a different experience, knowing you’re my last baby. It makes every cuddle just a little more precious, and makes me wish to get through these rough days less. Actually, they’re really not that rough.

There’s definitely some benefits to being the third child. You definitely have more relaxed parents than your siblings had. E had nervous new parents and G had parents who were figuring out how to parent more than one child. You have parents who have been there, done that, and so not much makes us nervous, which means not much upsets you. You are the calmest baby we’ve had. The vacuum can be running, your siblings can be screaming, and you can be sleeping.

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TWO

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Sometimes I have a hard time time coming to terms with the fact that you’ll be two, since for me, time has stood still during this pandemic. Much like my desk calendar in the city, my mind is stuck in March. You know, back before you even knew how to walk? So how can it be that you’re two? On the other hand, it seems like I’ve been telling you forever that you don’t “get” to wear a mask until you’re two! Just a little bit longer to wait, we keep telling you. (Don’t think it’s lost on me that the biggest marker of you turning two will be that you need to be masked now - what a perfect snapshot of our world).

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18 Months

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Somehow we’re halfway through 1. It’s unimaginable, because just a few days ago was your first birthday, and then we all went into quarantine and suddenly it’s today and the calendar says six months have gone by. At the same time when I think about the fact that you weren’t walking when daycare closed and we all started this home quarantine, that seems forever ago. You running around is the best thing ever. It’s a half gallop, half fall as you move slightly sideways with your belly out and arms pumping.

As we hit one and a half, you’ve picked up a few new tricks, grew some more teeth, and have a slightly better vocabulary. It’s hard to count all your words, because you have a lot that you’ll use randomly, but not often enough for me to remember unless I happen to write them down at the time. There’s a lot of context that comes with your words too. If you’re saying “bee” and looking out the window, you literally want to see a bee. But if you’re walking around saying the same thing with your arms up in the air, you’re looking for some specific object, as in “Where could it be?”

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THREE

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Three feels big. Heavy and important and monumental. Two still felt like a baby, still felt close to birth, with everything felt fresh and new. Three feels so big and so old. It’s hard to explain the feeling, but when I had babies I didn’t feel like a mother so much. I felt like a caregiver of tiny humans, someone who was given a gift of these squishly little creatures to take care of. Now I feel like I have a child. A child that I have to raise, mother, and teach.

Three is old enough to ask questions and remember things that I’ve told him. Three is big enough that I need to think about what I say before I saw it, unless I want it repeated forever and to everyone.

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15 Months

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Well hello there, 15 Months!

I was talking to the director of our daycare recently, and mentioned how happy G seems to be there, and in the non-infant room now. She replied “He’s just happy to be HERE,” waving her arms around “in life!” It’s pretty true. It doesn’t really matter what we’re doing or where we’re going, G is thrilled to be a part of it. The more he learns about life, the more he is enthusiastic about joining in.

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ONE YEAR

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I’ve been counting down for this for a year, but still somehow I can’t believe that we’re here. I barely remember you as an infant, those days were so long ago. And these last 6 months have flown by.

You are so much fun right now. Always laughing, always moving. You’re still “talking” and mimicking us all like crazy, and have started pointing all over the place to tell us your opinions and what you’d like. You have strong feelings and get angry quick if I tell you that you can’t have my phone or something else you want.