Feeling More Optimistic

20 Weeks


There's a reason I switched doctors this time around.  I just love this doctor so much.  She'll give me straight talk, odds and numbers, she'll tell me when to worry, and she'll also make me feel a lot better.  Maybe it's the first 5 minutes of every appointment when she spends time telling me how cute my belly is haha, but I always leave feeling better.  

Yes we're still worried about possible complications, yes I'm going to continue to be monitored by the high risk doctor at Tufts, and yes if I start bleeding our plans could change very quickly... BUT my doctor reassured me that she's not worried at all.  She's betting on this being a completely normal pregnancy and delivery, where the only thing we'll have to worry about is me hemorrhaging again!  (I joke, but rest assured we have a very detailed plan in place to deal with this, which is why I'm not too worried). And we knew going into this that any future pregnancies would come with a risk of hemorrhaging. The rest of the things that have popped up have been completely random, and have no higher risk of recurring on a future pregnancy than they would on someone else. 

Honestly the thing I'm most worried about today?  This crazy baby.  Every ultrasound, every time they try to hear a heartbeat... flips.  Non stop jumping all around.  Every single doctor I've seen has made some comment along the lines of "Whoa.. this one is crazy.  Get ready!"  WHYYY!?  We make calm little cute babies!!  I'm so not ready for a crazy active baby... haha

Also this baby has been tanking my BP lately.  I usually have lowish blood pressure, 105 over 65 is probably average, but today it was 90 over 58 (which is about normal for this pregnancy so far!).  Still, it made the nurse panic a bit.  "Are you okay? Do you get dizzy??"  Sure, I told her.  "ARE YOU DIZZY RIGHT NOW!?!?!" she panicked.  No, I told her, I was okay.  But usually I get dizzy or black out at least once a day.. but I was pretty used to it.  And so I got another lecture about drinking more water and then putting my feet up.  Apparently that's what she used to do when she worked at a nursing home, and it works really well haha.  

So the next time you see Tom chasing me around with a bottle of water and a pillow for my feet, at least you'll know why... 

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