I mostly didn't know what to expect for pregnancy symptoms. I figured I'd be puking in garbage cans left and right and making Tom go out in the middle of the night to buy me pickles. (Again, thanks movies). I've seen friends and family members pregnant before, and it didn't seem that bad? But as I soon found out, most of pregnancy is about suffering in private.
Seriously, who decided that the worst pregnancy symptoms would happen at the beginning when you're not supposed to be telling anyone you're pregnant!? It's the worst cruel joke nature could play on you. I was lying and faking my way through life while feeling like I was going to die at the same time. I was also feeling a bit dramatic haha.
In all honesty, I figured I'd tell the world once I found out I was pregnant. But as soon as I did find out, I was so convinced that something bad would happen or that it wasn't real, it felt dumb telling people. So besides Tom, I only told my best friend and one co-worker (half because I needed someone to talk to at work, and half because she usually asks me about once a month if I'm pregnant and I knew I wouldn't be able to lie to her).
There were a few times when I came close, especially when someone would tell me I looked sick or tired and was asking me how I was feeling. But it just felt like this very private thing, and I found myself not wanting to tell people, but at the same time wanting to scream it in the middle of every conversation. It was super weird.
For a while, I didn't feel any symptoms. Or I was, but I wasn't associating them with pregnancy. I was exhausted, but maybe that was because I wasn't getting a lot of sleep. My stomach felt off and I was crampy, but maybe that's because of something I ate. Nothing felt so new and different that I couldn't explain it. So when I hit 6 weeks and wasn't throwing up everywhere, I figured I'd conquered this pregnancy.
And then week 7 hit. In addition to cramps and heartburn and digestive issues (seriously why does no one warn you about those symptoms??), I noticed I was feeling car sick more often. Looking at my phone was making me dizzy and I felt off a lot. But because I wasn't throwing up, I figured it wasn't morning sickness. It actually took me a few days before I finally admitted, okay this is morning sickness, and this little thing inside me is causing it. It pretty much felt like I was car sick, but all day, no matter where I was.
"Eat more!" everyone told me... but let me tell you how much that did NOT work for me. Food made me feel super queasy. In the mornings I'd feel so sick that trying to choke down a cracker became torture. I'd recover a bit by 9am, where I would become ravenous for the next 3 hours, and nothing I ate was enough. And then I'd spend the rest of the day regretting everything I ate, and swearing off food for good.
It seemed like every day my body would decide to try out a new symptom. And then it would disappear for a few days making me think it was over, only to reappear with a vengeance. No heartburn for a week turns into the worst heartburn I've ever had for a 24 hour period. "I don't know what people are talking about, my boobs aren't sore at all and they definitely aren't any bigger" turns into "OMG what are these things and why are they killing me!?" the next day. And I definitely got the super smell that everyone talks about too. Our new carpet smells like newspaper by the way. Tom can't smell it, but trust me it does.
The only thing that was consistent was the constant exhaustion. Some days I'd go to bed at 8, sleep 9 hours, take a 2-3 hour nap the next day and still be tired. I could fake my way through work pretty well, mostly because I had no choice, but I had no energy or motivation to do anything at home. Cleaning, unpacking, fun activities... they all were put aside for sleep.
Overall though, I still think I was lucky. My symptoms were a lot milder than most, and I escaped from most of the worst pregnancy side effects. If I can make it through the entire pregnancy without throwing up, I think that means that I win!